How to Drink a Bottle of Wine Without Getting a Hangover

OK, most of us want to enjoy the pleasures of alcohol from time to time and let the good times roll, but we are terrified of the horrible morning beast of hangover (especially all of us who are over 30). It drains our good mood and makes us speak Norwegian in the bathroom in the morning. It makes us apprehensive when we enter a room full of party people and see the open bar glimmering in the corner. The beast simply takes away half of the fun that drinking often provides, because it constantly reminds us that it is alive and growing with each glass we raise on our eager lips.

But hey, I have some good news for you! There is, after all, a way to kill the beast and enjoy the joys of drinking. If you follow the below procedure, you should be able to drink a bottle of wine and wake up hangover free in the morning. It works, I can tell you that much because I used to have the most horrible hangovers after just having a couple of glasses of wine.

The method, however, only applies to normally built men (and huge men, of course). Women and lightweights shouldn't, unfortunately, expect similar results. It's not my fault. Blame the laws of physics. Well, here we go:

1. Choose a wine that has less than 13% alcohol.

2. Don't buy the cheap stuff.

3. Start drinking only when you are sober/hangover-free.

4. Have a hearty meal and a handful of almonds before you start drinking.

5. Start drinking early, preferably between 5 p.m. and 6 p.m.

6. Drink the first two glasses relatively quickly. That allows you to get into a good mood and enjoy the feeling of being a bit tipsy - a real social butterfly.

7. After the first two glasses, and showing off your amazing small talk skills, drink two large glasses of water and take a 30-minute/1 hour break.

8. After the break, drink no more than a glass of wine per hour and eat something between each glass or have a light meal later in the evening.

9. Drink a large glass of water between every glass of wine.

10. Stop drinking before 11 p.m. If you haven't finished the wine, throw it away or store it.

11. After you are done with the wine, have a small snack and drink two large glasses of water.

12. Go to sleep before midnight and have a glass of water by your bed. If you wake up thirsty in the middle of the night, take a sip of water.

13. Try to sleep at least 8 hours.

14. Wake up hangover free.

Reference: J._Max_Cromwell